Sometimes, even though we know what we’re doing is wrong, we still choose to do it. We follow the temptations that the enemy lays out– what he dangles in front of us.
I am saved. I have made mistakes. I chose to make those mistakes. I have given in to temptation. I had felt conviction and I wanted to fight it. And I believe that is why events occurred in my life.
When what meant so much to me was taken away, and I was left with nothing– nothing but God, who will never leave me, I began to realize the mistake I had made. I succumbed to the conviction I had been fighting and I asked my Father to forgive me.
When you go through trials, majority of the time it is to push something out of you (aka prune you). I understand that this needed to be pushed out of me and I am accepting responsibility of what I did. I allowed myself to be lead by the lust of the flesh and I won’t do that again. I know it was wrong; I knew then too, I just didn’t want to see it that way.
I’m waiting for my future husband and in that waiting I want to be obedient and keep any intimacy for marriage.
In addition to that mistake, I’m learning about myself and working on my other flaws. I can be stubborn and prideful and hardheaded. I don’t want to be that way. I want to be humble and kind and submissive and graceful.
I want to be the person God made me to be. I want to be the person my soulmate is looking for, whoever you are. Just know that I am working on me so much right now to be who you need. And I am praying for you.
With love and grace.